Stu Blog

I think quite possibly the most amazing part of the Rod Blagojevich story is the fact that he has a 4% approval rating…BEFORE this scandal. 
 
I actually think that this will help his approval ratings.  Prediction: he’s at a minimum of 6% by the next poll.  I think at least a few people will think he’s being railroaded by “the man” with “the tape recorder.” 
 
If he can hit those lofty heights of the elusive 6% approval rating, it would be as common to find a Rod Blagojevich fan, as it is to find someone who doesn’t believe we landed on the moon.
 
You have to take a quick minute to admire the bravery of Barack Obama, who came out and made it clear that he thought the governor should resign.  Of course, this is after he endorsed him in 2006 and helped him get elected, so multiple ongoing investigations weren’t enough for him want him to a resign.  And his approval rating falling to 4% wasn’t enough.  And, the first day he was quoted by the FBI in taped conversations trying to sell his old senate seat wasn’t enough.  But man—when he slept on it Tuesday night (and after every other politician had said he should resign) wow, was Barack pissed!  Who said he wouldn’t take on his own party!
 
Honestly, is it possible to think of anyone who has an approval rating lower than 4%?  I bet you that Josef Stalin would have a higher approval rating than 4%.  Scott Peterson?  There has to be more than 4% who sympathize with his love of Christmas-time fishing. 
 
I think the most obvious candidate for an approval rating lower than 4% would be Adolf Hitler.  But you have to figure you’d have 1% of people who are just racist skinheads.  Then there’s another 1% that would press the wrong button when answering.  Then, I think there’s at least another 2% who would just think it’s funny to see news anchors fretting about how many people approve of Adolf Hitler. 
 
If you’re wondering what kind of company the pre-arrest Blagojevich had–about 4% of Americans approve of violent demonstrations.  “Governor, your latest approval rating is in, voters like you as much as they like people who blow up abortion clinics.”
 
And he did edge out a few things:
3% approve full page pop up ads.
3% approve of cell phone use in a movie theater.
3% approve of the use of drugs such as “LSD, speed and heroin.”
 
Blagojevich couldn’t quite rise to the level of the 5% who approve of the practice of female circumcision.  You know you’re not doing a good job if you’re less popular than forced genital mutilation. 
 
Look, Rod Blagojevich is screwed.  His career is over, and he’s probably going to jail for a long, long time.  I think he should name himself to the senate seat immediately, run over a bag of puppies, and punch a toddler in the face on camera.  Just go for it Rod.  Be the only person in history with a 0% approval rating.  You’re so close—don’t stop now.
 
UPDATE: Fox News just ran a poll saying Blagojevich was up to 8%.  So, apparently trying to sell a Senate seat will double your approval rating.  That’s a good illustration of how little we like politicians at this point.  “Oh, he wanted cash?  Finally the government isn’t giving crap away like they normally do!”

Here’s a pointless post for you. 

I wanted to make sure my last post went up, and I was a little too lazy to type in “glennbeck.com” and then click on blog.  So I just typed in “stu blog” into my fancy google search.

What I discovered was very disturbing: there are two other Stu people with Stu blogs that are ahead of me on google.  Why should I have the bronze medal in Stu blogs? 

The second place guy is someone in New Zealand who has a recent post titled “Edinburgh Fringe Festival.” Really Stu?  I mean, what a sell out.   OF COURSE you can get lots of readers writing about fringey festivals like the Edinburgh Fringe Festival—but that’s just way too commercial for me.

The first place guy is named Stu Maschwitz.  He’s apparently some big wig visual effects designer or something.  Wow–”I direct movies and make things look like other things.  Aren’t I impressive?”

Here’s his entire wikipedia entry:

Stuart T. Maschwitz, commonly known as Stu Maschwitz, is the co-founder and chief technology officer of The Orphanage, a visual effects company in California. He has worked as senior visual effects supervisor on several films. He previously worked at Industrial Light and Magic.

Maschwitz was writer, director, cinematographer, and editor for the film The Last Birthday Card (2000). He directed the “Song For The Lonely [Almighty Remix]” segment of The Very Best of Cher: The Video Hits Collection (2004). His film Skate Warrior is an example of guerrilla filmmaking. He studied animation at the California Institute of the Arts.

In 2007 he authored the book The DV Rebel’s Guide: An All-Digital Approach to Making Killer Action Movies on the Cheap for Peachpit Press.

 Well, my wikipedia entry is at least three times as long, and includes the name “Honkey Whitesville” in it.  Isn’t that enough for me to be the number one Stu blog?  Can’t you computer geniuses out there link to my blog and make it beat out Mr. Fringe Festival and Mr. Accomplished Movie Career Guy?  Is there no fairness left on this earth?

I was watching TV tonight and I saw a commercial for Lincoln.  They claim to be offering “Employee Pricing Plus” which would allow potential buyers to pay the same price that employees pay–plus additional cash back. 

But what happens if an employee buys a car?  Doesn’t this launch a never ending cycle of cash back, leading to lower employee prices, leading to more cash back, and so on until the earth folds down upon itself in a fiery tornado of death?  Or at least until the car is free?